I had a conversation with an old friend yesterday about toxic relationships. She explained how her teenage girls group felt like they had to dress and act a certain way to impress not just the boys, but their female peers to feel like they belong. It hurt me to hear this because these same teenage girls are going to grow into woman who will unfortunately will unconsciously navigate their adulthood the same way. I’ve been through it all. Relationships that are so abusive mentally and emotionally that I didn’t even realize it until I had to recover through the pain and hurt; purging feeling of guilt, resentment and anger I didn’t even know I had until I was displaced into a realm of feelings I had refused to feel because of “love”. I have had friendships that I did not think were damaging to me until I gave everything that I could to aid them through tough times and they ride off into the sunset without even a thank you.
It seems everyone these days is trying to find the right people to surround themselves with or at our age, that one person to spend the rest of their lives with. Yet, all that I see are people following others around and trying to master their emotions, when truthfully, we have not taken enough time to master ourselves. Our relationships should not burden us to compromise ourselves in order to bring joy into someone else’s life but somehow, those who are vibrating on a lower frequency than us, find ways to wiggle in and let their energy affect you before moving on to their happily every after.
But before you waste your time, please keep in mind that there are people out here that you do not have to beg to love you. There are individuals who You don’t have to beg for time. You do not have to beg to be seen or be made to feel significant. You deserve someone who makes you feel important and present; someone that says less, does more and still understands you are two different people, forever growing. Someone not loving you is their missed opportunity, not yours.
Truth is, if there are any relationships in which you have to continuously remind and or prove your worth, they are not the company you should be keeping…