Tag: #blogger

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A Concious Effort to Feel

Hey everyone! I got a few questions in my email about my day to day emotions after the babies were born and how I deal with everything that comes at me. I truthfully don’t even know how I am doing any of this! Everything is such a big blur and while my day basically fluctuates between working out, reading, cooking and writing – I simultaneously find myself double breastfeeding, getting peed on and laughed at, trying to catch spit up before it hits the carpet and trying to actually be human; you know, change my human setting that allows me to actual feel? LOL

With that, I really sat and made a list of the top activities I engage in that allow me to feel without going to extremes like jumping out of planes and shit…

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Trust yourself. Trust the process.

Whoops! I made a big mistake and opened up far more than I was sure I was comfortable with via conversation. I mean, I have spoken before about becoming more transparent through writing and I felt as if I wanted this to translate better into my real life relationships. Because actual friends were few and far in between throughout my life, I found myself handling most of what life was throwing at me alone.

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Losing myself in relationships

Man this is out of control! Trouble in paradise? No. Lost my best friend? Not quite? Super social? Ehh,  not really. Happy? No. Everyone around me is just fine. Yet I find MYSELF slipping away every minute that I try to make sure that everyone else is okay. I have been thinking of a way to write about this without feeling vulnerable but I mean thats what this is right? So here it is. I am completely losing who I am and who I imagined that I would be at this time in my life, completely in and to my my relationships with others. Maybe it is a sign from the universe that something has to change but one thing for sure is that it does not serve me nor anyone around me any good for it to happen. 

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Combating Postpartum Depression: When the Glow is Gone

So here I am! Two months post partum with the twins. They are amazing! My toddler is adjusting so well but I have to admit, not everyday is sunshine and rainbows. I haven’t had to deal with the postpartum monkey jumping on my back like I did with Gabriel but I think I owe that to being a lot more conscious of my thoughts and where I let them take me. You know, that defining moment where you can make the distinction between what you feel and whats real.